Pythons and Sweet Treats

This morning my munchkin and I went on a little outing to our local wildlife park. And as the early spring weather proved rainy and cold, we spent much of our time exploring the delightfully warm reptile pavilion. We happened to time our arrival perfectly to attend the reptile show, the highlight of which was a large python that the children were given the opportunity to touch. Now, I’ve never been one to run away screaming at the sight of a spider or even to harbor any real fear of snakes. But when the zookeeper approached with that big, slithery python, my stomach did a couple of nervous little somersaults, and my first instinct was to take a step back. But holding my daughter in my arms, I watched as she turned to me for reassurance, and forced myself to stand there and smile. And much to my surprise, my teeny tiny little two-year-old then confidently reached out and patted the snake, saying, “Hello python. It’s very nice to meet you!”



Mmmm...Sweet Treats!

 Delightful story, but what on earth does it have to do with sweet treats, you might ask. Actually, more than you might think. Watching my toddler confidently patting a python, I was reminded of how very responsible we are for setting the tone for our children. Instinctively, they look to us for guidance, and rely on us to help them as they form their outlook on the world. What a gigantic responsibility that puts on us as parents! And while they still look to us, how important it is that we not squander the opportunity!

Several months ago, my hubby became quite ill and we now observe a very strict new diet in our home. One of the things we’ve eliminated from the menu is all refined sugar – initially a seemingly insurmountable task, as I am a self-proclaimed sugar fanatic. But as the months have progressed, I’ve begun to miss sugar less and less. And when I sneak a little “treat” from time to time, I end up feeling so dreadfully ill that I often regret my choice. It is amazing the negative effect that sugar has on our bodies – an effect that often can only be really noticed when we stop pumping our bodies constantly full of junk.

It has been a powerful wake-up call for me. If refined sugar has that sort of effect on my body, imagine what it must do to the body and mind of my tiny, still developing child. I have no intention of entirely banning her for life from every sugary snack. But I am making an even-more-conscious-than-ever effort to redefine the meaning of “treat” in our household. Cutting down on sugar doesn’t mean depriving your sweet tooth. The world is full of naturally sweet, healthy options that don’t contain any refined sugar, and will leave mommies, daddies, and little ones feeling so much better about themselves. Here are a few yummy ideas to replace those sugary snacks…

• Try baking with maple syrup or honey rather than white or brown sugar (brown is just as processed and just as bad for you, contrary to popular belief). To use honey in place of sugar, use 7/8 cup for every cup of sugar, and reduce the liquid in the recipe by 3 tablespoons. To use maple syrup in place of sugar, use 3/4 cup of maple syrup for every cup of sugar, decreasing the total amount of liquid in the recipe by 3 tablespoons. These substitutions work particularly well when baking muffins, loaves, and hearty cookies (such as healthy oatmeal raisin cookies).

• Give your traditional peanut butter and jam sandwiches a healthy makeover. Replace peanut butter with almond butter with no sugar added, and replace jam with thinly sliced bananas or apples, or a little pasteurized honey.

• Say goodbye to Aunt Jemima and switch to pure maple syrup when indulging in a pancake breakfast. Switch to whole wheat flour and throw some fresh blueberries into the batter, and pancakes become a healthy, wholesome meal!

·    If your child is a juice junkie, think about investing in a juicer and making your own healthy juices at home. Store bought juices are often full of sugar and artificial flavours and colours, and even the “healthier” juice options are really devoid of most of their nutritional value by the time they hit your child’s juice cup.

·    Don’t forget the best sweet treat of all – lots of healthy fresh or frozen fruit. With the money you’ll save when skipping the snack food aisle, you’ll have lots of room in the family budget for more vitamin-packed fruits and veggies!

Happy healthy snacking, Joyful Mommies and tots! And stay tuned for some of my favourite “no-junk” treat recipes….





Spring Toy Cleaning 101

Spring is finally here, and as the brightness of the sun begins to illuminate the grunginess of your child’s toy box, perhaps it’s time to consider a little spring toy cleaning. After working for a decade in the field of early intervention and spending what seemed to be a sizable portion of that time cleaning and disinfecting toys used as part of my work with families, toy cleaning has become, surprisingly even to me, a bit of an area of expertise. As such, there are few things that bother me more now than really dirty, grimy toys…and yet they get that way soooo easily!

Toy cleaning actually isn’t as straightforward as it seems, and knowing what you are doing can make this potentially very big task much simpler. So before you begin tackling a little spring toy cleaning, here are a few helpful toy cleaning tips to get you started…

Remember that not all toys are created equally, and not all toys should be cleaned in the same way!!! Generally speaking, toys can be divided into three cleaning categories:

·    SUBMERGABLE TOYS – Most plastic toys, excluding battery operated toys or toys with small holes in which water can become trapped, can be submerged in water. These are the easiest toys to clean, and can be scrubbed down with dish soap and hot water, thoroughly rinsed and allowed to air dry. If you are worried about really disinfecting toys, using a mild bleach solution is most effective. And if you are looking for an easy way out, many of the studier plastic toys (i.e. nesting cups, plastic links, teething rings, etc.) can be washed safely on the top rack of the dishwasher.

·    WIPE DOWN TOYS – Many toys should NOT be submerged in water as this may result in damage to the toy. Toys in this category include battery operated and electronic toys, toys with small holes in which water could become trapped, toys with stickers or paper labels, books, some wooden toys, and puzzles. To clean wipe down toys, wipe toys thoroughly with a damp soapy cloth, then again with a clean damp cloth OR use a dry antibacterial cloth OR wipe down with a cloth dampened in mild bleach solution, allowing to air dry.

·    CLOTH TOYS – Most cloth toys, including stuffed animals, cloth baby toys, and doll clothes can be easily washed with a mild, baby safe detergent in the gentle cycle of your washing machine. If cloth toys are handmade, delicate, or of great sentimental value, hand washing in warm water using a gentle hand washing detergent is a better option. Allow toys to dry inside on a drying rack or outside on a clothesline.

Before returning clean toys to their rightful place, be sure to thoroughly wipe down the toy box or storage unit. And rather than just dumping all of the toys back into toy chaos, take the opportunity to purge, organize, and rotate your child's toys – it will save your sanity while at the same time creating a better learning environment for your child.

And just a few more HELPFUL HINTS:

·    To get into grimy, hard to reach spaces while cleaning your child’s toys, try using an old toothbrush. If that doesn’t do the trick, use the tip of a wooden kebab stick (available at most grocery stores) to dig into all those dirty little crevices.

·    For a natural and environmentally friendly cleaning solution, try scrubbing your child’s toys using just a dish brush, water, and a sprinkle of baking powder – a great, non-toxic cleanser.

·    To eliminate germs from a hard-to-wash stuffed toy, simply wrap the toy in a plastic bag and pop into the freezer overnight.

Happy toy cleaning, joyful mommies!!!!

Adventures in Grocery Shopping - Part 2

Today was grocery shopping day, and I am pleased to report that for the first time in a long while, my secretly-observe-other-mommies-grocery-shopping experiment (to read more click here) revealed something truly wonderful. A mom with three little ones was circuiting the store in the opposite direction that I was, so I had the privilege of passing her in almost every aisle. And I say privilege because it truly was. Her cart was overflowing with groceries that almost obscured a smiling little boy, roughly two or three years of age, inside of the cart. A baby about twelve months old sat buckled into the seat. And a little girl of about four or five walked beside the buggy. This mom had her hands full, no doubt about it. And watching her shop was a thing of beauty.

Each time I passed her in an aisle, she was happily chatting with her three children. Asking them questions. Listening to their answers. She was so animated in her conversation with them that it was no wonder her little ones were captivated – even the passersby were. At one point I watched her acting unabashedly silly, her three little ones giggling away as she all the while continued to fill her cart. It was clear that she was in the midst of a monumental juggling act, yet she was the picture of grace under pressure. Her interaction with her cart full of kiddies was so lovely to watch that I meant to say something to her about it (recognition for a job well done is something moms don’t get nearly as often as they should), but she eluded me in the checkout aisle.

I was so happy to observe lovely, engaging shopping mom today. Because as I’ve conducted this little experiment on my own over the past few months, I’ve observed other approaches far more often, as I’m guessing you may have too. A sprinkling of nagging. A smattering of scolding. A whole lot of rushing and hurrying. And many well-intentioned, busy moms, trying their best to get their shopping done, paying more attention to the items on their list than to the munchkins in their carts. Until, of course, those munchkins start wailing, or running away, or toppling a tidy display (things that bored munchkins do very, very well). And then a return to the nagging and the scolding.

Now don’t get me wrong, I totally get it. On days when I am tired or rushed or otherwise not at my best, the last place I want to be is at the grocery store. And it can be tempting to just rush on through, eyes on the checkout aisle. But one thing is true without fail – When I am not at my best, grocery shopping doesn’t go as smoothly.

Our little ones look to US for cues about how to act and how to feel about the situations they encounter. They bring their own unique style and approach to it all (more on that next time), but we are the ones who set the tone. Every aspect of parenting is a dance between a big parent and a tiny little dance partner (or a whole cart-full of dance partners, for those who are so blessed). Grocery shopping is no different. My daughter brings her feisty little personality, her stage of development (totally and wholeheartedly TWO), her little body bursting with energy, her mood of the day, and many more things to the dance. So if I am to lead well, I had better be prepared, and suit up in my very best dancing shoes (even on days when I’d rather be in fuzzy slippers). When I go into any interaction – grocery shopping included – at my best, I provide her with the best opportunity to do her best. And isn’t that what joyful mommyhood is all about?

So here’s your next challenge: The next time you head out the door to go grocery shopping, try a quick little mommy-check. Take a few deep breaths. Relax. Determine that you will have FUN with your child while shopping. And determine that you will devote more attention (negative attention such as nagging and scolding does not count) to the munchkin in your cart than to the items on your list. I try to think of grocery shopping as a fun morning out with my little one, putting myself in the same mindset as I would when attending playgroup or a fun parent and tot activity. As with almost anything in mommyhood, attitude makes a HUGE difference, and sometimes all it takes is a little reminder to get back on the right track.

Of course, attitude is only the beginning, so hang in there for more in this little series. Still to come:

1)  Your Unique Munchkin - What your child brings to the equation, and how to adapt according to your child’s unique style.

2)  Grocery Shopping Tool Kit - Tried and tested tips for making every grocery trip better!

3)  HELP!!! – How to change patterns that aren’t working.

4)  Smiles in Every Aisle – Grocery store games and activities.

Adventures in Grocery Shopping - Part 1

Ah, grocery shopping. The mere thought strikes fear and dread in the hearts of parents everywhere. Working with hundreds of families over the years, it was a topic I was asked about again and again. It wasn’t exactly my area of expertise. But helping parents cope with challenges, and helping them discover ways of enriching daily routines to promote their child’s development was. So I spent a surprising amount of time throughout the course of my career discussing, problem solving, and strategizing with parents around the “issue” of grocery shopping with kids. And over time, with the help of parents and their feedback, I developed a little “grocery shopping bag of tricks”.

Now the mommy of a two year old, I’ve been pleased to discover for myself (sigh of relief) that those tricks really do work. And while grocery shopping isn’t the easiest part of my week, it is often one of the most fun parts, for both my daughter and myself (honestly – I’m not kidding!). And while we’re having fun in the grocery store, my daughter is having one of the richest learning experiences I could hope for her to have.

Now by this point, many of you are (justifiably) rolling your eyes. Grocery shopping with little ones is TOUGH. I totally get it. And I agree. BUT – and here’s the important point – it can always get better. Of the many families I worked with on this issue over the years, there wasn’t one I can recall who was not able to make some improvement to this necessary family routine. It may never end up being the best part of your week. But it doesn’t have to be the worst.

So because this is a big topic, I plan to chat about it in several parts – kind of a continuing series on the joys and pitfalls awaiting you up and down the aisles. But as I leave you waiting in breathless anticipation, a little homework assignment for you…

The next time you go grocery shopping, pay attention to the parents you see shopping with their little ones. Watch (but subtly – the last thing a harried parent needs is a gawking stranger on top of everything else!) to see how they are engaging and interacting with their child. Listen (subtly!) to their conversations. Observe their body language. If you were a little person strapped against your will into their cold metal cart, would you be captivated by the experience they were sharing with you? Enchanted by the sound of their voice? Fascinated by the rich and colourful world they were helping you to explore? Hmmmm….

Life As Usual

Life as usual…It’s the joy of January! After two months of chaos in our household – all of November with my husband in hospital, and all of December with him recovering at home (not to mention our daughter’s second birthday and dinosaur birthday bash, Christmas, New Year’s, and all the accompanying busyness of the holidays) – life is finally back to normal. I have never before been a fan of January. But this year, I am relishing it as though it were June…

Anyone who has ever studied child development knows the importance of routine. Routine brings order, consistency, and predictability to the life of a child, helping them to make sense of their world. But even more importantly, the predictability of a consistent routine helps little people feel safe and secure in a big and busy world. Never have I seen that demonstrated more clearly than the past couple of days in our home.

After two months of unavoidable chaos, our return to normalcy these past few days has been met with nothing short of jubilation by my just-turned-two-year-old. Playing happily, eating heartily, sleeping (and even napping – it feels like a miracle!) soundly, the value of a routine is written all over her little smiling face.

And it is written on mine. I am a firm believer in the importance of a routine for mommies, too. For me, it is the key to not only my sanity, but also to ensuring we are making the most of each and every precious moment. Show me a mom who is “bored” at any point of her day, and I’ll show you a mommy who hasn’t yet developed a great routine.

The Joy of Order...

And what better time than the New Year to improve a little on your routine! Now is the perfect time to find new activities to enjoy with your little one, or to discover some new ways of getting connected in your community. And while you’re at it, why not sit down and actually think through your daily routine…What’s working? What’s not? And how are you going to change it? Being a truly joyful mommy is all about being intentional – thinking through how you are parenting, and how you will make the most of this most precious and important time in your life and your child’s. Could there be a better New Year's resolution to make? Wishing you all a truly JOYFUL 2011…

Getting Connected

It doesn’t feel like November today, at least not here where I sit typing, facing my kitchen windows. Unseasonably warm and gloriously sunny, this is a rare gem of a November day. The kind of day that would be perfect for an afternoon walk with my daughter, or even to spend some time playing with bubbles in the backyard. The kind of November day that will soon just be a sunny memory, as the rain and the clouds and the dreariness roll in.



Backyard Bubbles in November



No, November is not my favourite month of the year. It’s not as bad as January and February – at least there is Christmas to look forward to – but it’s no match for the lovely months, like April and July. November means rain, cold, and early nightfall. It means more time spent indoors, and less opportunities for spontaneous outdoor fun. And that it why November is one of those months when I am SO grateful for all of the wonderful community activities that my daughter and I are involved in.

We have a pretty busy social calendar, my sweet little munchkin and I. Five mornings per week we pack up and head out the door, to one of the many wonderful drop-in playgroups or parent and tot classes that are available to us to attend. On any given day, there are multiple fun events that we have to choose from. But being connected in our community wasn’t always that easy.

When my daughter was about four months old, I began to slowly emerge from my sleep-deprived, mommy-of-a-newborn stupor and excitedly began looking for classes and playgroups to attend. For nearly a decade, connecting new parents with community resources was part of my job description. And yet when I tried to find activities to attend myself, the hunt was far more difficult than I ever anticipated it could be. Had I not believed so passionately in the importance of connecting in the community, I may very well have given up. It was a frustrating, discouraging affair. But I soldiered on, gradually discovering more and more resources, and finding a rich array of opportunities for our family to learn and play together.



Dancing with Delight at our Favourite Playgroup



I am passionate in my belief that connecting with community resources is one of the most important tools you can have in your mommy tool kit. It will benefit you, and it will benefit your little one. Whether you are home full time, working full time, or some combination of the two, community activities are a wonderful opportunity to connect with other parents and have fun learning together with your child. And the resources in your community are likely far richer than you know. It will take work to discover the best opportunities. But here are some tips to help you along the way…



Tips for Getting Connected in Your Community

1.   Call or visit your public health unit. They often compile a list of resources for new parents – a great place to start. Just don’t assume that this list – or any other – is an exhaustive one.

2.   Ask every parent you know what groups they attend or have attended with their children.

3.   Check out your local community centre for listings of upcoming classes.

4.   Visit your local library.  Many libraries offer programs for children and families free of charge. And most also have brochures available with listings of other community programs.

5.   Check your local newspaper and attend family-friendly community events. These events can be a lot of fun for the whole family, and as a bonus you may find information booths promoting other community programs.

6.   Look online, but don’t assume you’ll find everything that’s out there, or that online listings are current. If you discover something that looks promising, follow up first before attempting to attend (a lesson learned the hard way!).

7.  Get out and try things! Not every program will be a good fit for your family. But the only way you’ll know is to try. The more you get out there and try things, the more parents you’ll meet and the more resources you’ll discover.

8.  Keep hunting! No matter how long you’ve been searching, there are likely some gems out there that you still don’t know about. Keep your eyes and ears open, and don’t forget to ask new parents you meet.

Helpful Hint: Here’s a secret that’s worth knowing! Many community centres offer “partnership classes” – classes offered at the community centre in conjunction with another organization, such as a music or dance school. These classes are often the same as ones offered through the other organization, but at the community centre rate – great value for your money!

And One More Helpful Hint: Never assume that the cost of a class has anything to do with the quality. The vast majority of the groups and classes that we attend are absolutely FREE, and I find them to be of a higher quality than many of the most expensive programs.

Thanksgiving Time Capsule

This weekend is Thanksgiving weekend here in Canada. And one thing is absolutely certain – no matter how challenging life may be or how difficult the trials you are facing, there is ALWAYS something to be thankful for when you are blessed to be a mommy or a daddy. This weekend I’ll be hugging my little one extra tight, and remembering all of the things I have to be grateful for.

As our family grows and our little ones get older, I want them to think of Thanksgiving as something more than pumpkin pie and turkey (or tofurkey in our happily vegetarian household!).  I want Thanksgiving to be a time in which we truly reflect on all that we have to be grateful for. So this year, I’m instituting a new tradition in our home – the Thanksgiving Time Capsule!

I’ve already purchased our family time capsule – a little box shaped like a treasure chest, found in our local craft store. One day down the road, I’ll have our children paint and decorate the outside of the treasure chest. But for now we’ll just focus on the inside. My goal is that each member of our family will create something special to tell of what we’re thankful for this year, to be tucked away in the treasure chest until next Thanksgiving. Then each and every year, we’ll repeat the tradition, reading through past years’ contributions and no doubt smiling at the memories they bring to mind.

No matter what the age or stage of your child, they can participate in and have fun with your family’s Thanksgiving time capsule…

·         Older children can write a list of all of the things they are thankful for.

·         Younger children can draw a picture of things they are thankful for – just be sure you write on the back of the picture, so that you remember what it represents in years to come.

·         Even the tiniest babies tell us what they’re thankful for – it’s just up to us to observe and interpret. Write a little list of the things your baby loves, decorating it if you’d like with a little tracing or print of a tiny hand or foot.

The lovely thing about this tradition is that it can be as simple or as elaborate as you’d like it to be. Some different twists on the time capsule tradition include…

·         Purchase a simple little notebook. At Thanksgiving dinner, ask each family member what they are thankful for and write their response in the notebook.

·        Create a video time capsule, asking each person to share what they are thankful for on video.

·       Create a Thanksgiving scrapbook. Have each person write or draw something that they are thankful for on small pieces of paper. Arrange them on a single scrapbook page, adding pictures of your Thanksgiving as a family, or little reminders of things you are thankful for – souvenirs from a family vacation, pictures of loved ones, etc.  Add a new page (or pages) to your scrapbook each year.

·        Or create another tradition to share as a family. Have fun, and Happy Thanksgiving!

The Power of Play

“Mommy, PLAY!!!”  the insistent little voice rings out above the din of the dishwasher. Chubby little fingers wrapped tightly around a toy, her eyes are wide with expectation.  It is a request repeated many times a day in our home. Often when the phone is ringing, or dinner is boiling over on the stove. In the hustle and bustle of daily life, on good days and on bad ones -”Mommy PLAY!” And each time I hear those words, I have reason to smile. Because those words are proof that my toddler knows I can play. And that she knows I will.

The reality is that play is not always as easy as it seems. Working with families of young children for over ten years, I watched many parents struggle to remember how to play. For some it felt awkward and uncomfortable. For others it seemed boring. But for many, the busyness of life simply got in the way. Now a busy mom myself, I understand the juggling act that parenthood can be. I too have days when I feel pressured by the frantic pace of life and tempted to put play on the backburner.

On those hectic days, I am grateful for the background I have that has helped me to understand the value of play. Play is critical to every child’s development, and the primary way in which children learn. Beginning at infancy and continuing on through school age, children develop gross motor and fine motor skills, learn new concepts, develop creativity and imagination, gain an understanding of the world around them, and practice social skills all through play. Spending time playing together with your child will help your child learn new things and make progress in all areas of development. And playing together will help you to build a fun, loving, mutually enjoyable relationship with your child, a foundation upon which to build for a lifetime.

Some parents naturally “remember” how to play. For others it takes a little effort. But taking the time to play with your child is truly worth the effort. There is no better way to bring joy to your child’s life, and to your own. Here are a few tips to make the most of playtime, based on research on child development, years of playing with hundreds of children, and delightful moments of playing with my own…

·    Relax, take some deep breaths, and make sure you are in the right frame of mind to have fun with your little one.

·     Sit down on the floor at your child’s eye level.

·     Don’t try too hard to “teach” your child anything. Remember that play is the most important way for children to learn. As you relax and play together, opportunities for learning will happen naturally.

·     Let your child direct the play. Watch and see what your child is interested in, then join in on the game.

·    Make playtime special. Try not to multitask (i.e. no folding laundry during playtime!).

·     Minimize distractions by turning the TV off, and ignoring the phone if possible.

·     Make playtime a part of your routine by setting aside a certain amount of time each day.

·     Don’t be afraid to be silly! Relax, have fun, and ENJOY this time with your child.

Whether you “remember” how to play or whether it is a challenge, there is no person better equipped to teach you than your child. The moments that I forget about my “to do” list and simply sit down to play are the most joyful moments of my day. The house may be a little messier. And my “to do” list may get a little longer. But my little girl is learning, growing, and thriving. And I have a front row seat, watching as she delights in each new discovery. What a privilege it is to be a part of that joy of discovery, and to share in her delight…

Sticker Bananas!

Oh, what a day it was! It began with a 5 am wake up by an unhappy, teething toddler, and quickly progressed into one of those disastrous days in which everything that can go wrong does. By 10 am I was kneeling beside a toy-plugged toilet, frantically reaching for the shut off valve and trying to calm a perplexed toddler as toilet water literally gushed across my back. And by noon, I had witnessed one of the most terrifying sights I have ever seen – my sweet little 21 month old tumbling end over end down the stairs. She was unhurt, and clearly far less upset by it than I was. She wanted a snack. I just couldn’t stop shaking.

That was the kind of day it had been when I opened our snack cupboard and discovered I had none of my “stand-by” snacks on hand – nothing that I could easily convince an overtired, teething, and understandably cranky toddler to eat. But sometimes those crazy mommy moments lead to the very best discoveries!

Like many toddlers, my little one can be picky and often eats like a bird. The only foods she’ll always eat are prepackaged treats that I try to avoid. There is a reason that companies spend the money they do on developing the colourful, cartoon character adorned packaging used in snack foods. And the reason is because it works. There is an abundance of research out there that illustrates the power of marketing techniques on little minds. So why not use that knowledge to our advantage, and do a little “mommy marketing” of our own?

It’s an idea that I recommended often to the families I once worked with, but neglected to try myself until necessity became the mother of invention. It took a disastrous morning last week for me to discover the power…of sticker bananas! Rummaging through the sticker drawer, I adorned an ordinary banana with a few cartoon character stickers. Never before a fan of bananas, my daughter gobbled down almost the entire thing! And every day since, she has not only been eating bananas, but actually requesting them like she would a prepackaged treat. Such a simple idea. But HUGE in our little world.

Sometimes it truly is the simplest ideas that add the most to our days. My hope is to share many of those simple ideas with you over the coming weeks and months. Little things that make life simpler for you, benefit your little one, and add a little joy and sparkle to your day. Because it’s those little moments of joyful mommyhood that matter the most – to you, and to the little ones you love.